So....where are you from?

Yes, my skin is brown... Yes, I dont have blue eyes or light hair, and YES, I have curves.... so I know I am different that the ideal image of an 'american' ... then why do I get annoyed when people ask me... 'where are you from?' hmmm what do you mean where am i from? I am sitting here in front of you ....sitting with you ... in this place, city, state, country... hmmm ... i dont have an accent... neither does my husband.... we have US passports.... so u still want to know where we are from?

just a short story - as we were crossing the Canada - U.S. border ....the well paid officer for the country asked me... to see our passports and I handed him two US passports and then he asked me... .after looking at the passports, 'country of citizenship ?'...hmmmmm should I tell him what i am thinking? - 'you freaking dumbass, you have two US passports...what the freak do you think is our country of citizenship?'... but I bit my tounge - probl for the better and said... 'United States' and I thought that was it...But he continued to ask - 'Both of you?' .... wow what should i say? he is getting paid from my tax dollars...they really do pick them right huh? Would he have asked the same question to two individuals who are white with blue eyes and blonde hair? Probl not...not knowing that most blue eyed-blondes are russian or french... but that wouldnt be a concern for him...since it fits his mold for 'american'....

And then again on our first anniversary trip at the B&B, at the breakfast table...another lodger asked us - so where are you guys from? polite enough...right? and we respond nicely enough - 'Philadelphia' ....and she responds 'Oh, I would have thought India'... what the heck?

So I have an advice for folks who would like to know our nationality.... ask something like - 'What country is your lineage from?' or 'What is your ethnicity?' or something like 'What is your ancestory?' but u get the idea.... just frustrating...honestly! or even better keep asking everyone you meet, regardless of color where they are from and wait for them to explain how their great-great-great-great-great-great grandparents came to the country on a boat and landed on Ellis Island...and then I will be happy!

What time is it???

So most people work a 9-5 job.... or some variation of that.... get up, leave for work between 7:30 - 8:30, leave and come home by 5:00 - 5:30 on average... atleast that is what I have been used to... so anything that we need to do needs to be done after those hours or on weekends ...unless we are all rich celebrities who could afford to have whatever I need to be hand delivered to me....while i got a massage in my personal mansion... ooh...only if... time to get out of la-la land....

So imagine my suprise when we started to build a house and needed to make an appt for the design center and found out that they are only open M-F from 9:00 am to 4:00 pm... hmm so how do we do this? how do I get my options chosen for my house? do I end up with crap that I dont want in the house? how do I???? Do they want working adults to buy thier houses or bums who sit at home all day? How do they think we are going to pay for all the options they want us to pick...if we cant go to work? I mean loosing 8 hours of pay, just to pick options that is going to cost us more money doesn't seem fair...does it? So after some probing we found out that they maybe be able to make exception and see us for a 8 hr appt on satruday... but wait... i dont want to sign up for another day of work on saturday.... urgh...guess we dont have any options...

Then came the need to see a doctor...for my dear hubby's knee... his dear knee that was injured in our rafting trip... we needed a doc who was open past 5 pm...someone who would look at a hurt person after business hours... just a doctor who is able to sacrifice one evening a week to see his 'working' patients after leaving work - the same work that pays for the insurance that pays for the doctor... hmmm....maybe i am asking for too much! After calling about 15 docs...i found a doc that is open on thursdays till 7 pm.... and i thought that my search was over... i was on the 9th cloud.... with joy... I told the nurse...that I need to make an appt for my husband who hurt his knee ..... and then my dreams were shattered... when the voice on the other side of the phone said... ' sorry maam, but this is a womens' only facility'....urgh... there i was ...hugging my phone in despair...what ...wha...do I do now???? So after calling about 30 more docs offices in the raleigh area...i decided to give up.... I guess we all will need to quit our jobs so that we can get any sort of service... work around their schedules, and then not be able to pay any bills... or even them!

I guess... until a brighter day when there are actual docs who can find it in their hearts to see a patient one day a week in the evening... we will all suffer...the awkward request to have a couple hours off... or suffer ino ur pain....

Yay we made it!

Take one day at a time - something we are told often

Carpe Diem - Seize the day

We have heard this a million times, from different people in our lives. But what does it mean to each of us... Ask anyone who knows me and they will attest to the fact that my mind goes a 100 miles a minute and I try to plan as far ahead as possible. I will draw out any and all possible scenarios... try and be prepared so that nothing can surprise me. I make sure that I am in total control of the situation before it even comes along. But things don't always work out the way we want them to...

So it definitely came as a surprise to me when someone was able to come into my life and have me head over heels in such a short period of time. And before I knew it, a whirlwind took over our lives and we were getting married. And then the engagement and wedding planning took over. We lost sight of all the good things in our relationship, why we were together. Fights became more consistent, tempers kept flaring, frustration took over... and before we knew it, we were married. Of course, things became a lot more calm afterwards. We were not burdened with as many responsibilities for the two weeks after the wedding. We enjoyed our time together, regained our focus and felt that we were ready to face what life had in store for us when we got back.... and when we landed back in the US - reality began!

We soon found out that dating and being married is two completely different worlds. We would have clash on every little thing, every minor detail would get on our nerves... But at the bottom of all of this, we knew that there is no one else either of us would rather be with. He is a very insightful, emotional and creative person, I on the other hand can be very dry, straight forward and completely lack creativity. So after 3 months of adjustment period, I think we were getting a hang of it. We learned to fill in what the other lacked and support what the other excelled in.

A year later, we are definitely getting a hang of this married thing... I think we are comfortable. Doesn't mean that we still don't have our little tiffs... we still do that on a very consistent basis. But I think we are getting a lot better an being able to understand and solve them. We both realized that we need each other to make this the best it can be. That we have made a commitment to support each other in good and the bad, in sickness and in health and in happiness and in sorrow. Faith in God and each other really helped us get through this first phase of our lives together. I don't know if we will every be able completely free of arguments and honestly I don't know if I want to.

All I can say is that I am thankful for everything that we have been through. We both always say, what doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger. Our first year has been eventful to say the least, but I think as we go on this roller coaster called life, we are both trying to live for the moment and enjoy each day!

I am sure there are a lot of new challenges ahead of us - as we become first time home owners or as we become parents (for those who are wondering - no we are not planning to get pregnant this year). I am sure there are a lot of new surprises waiting for us... and I am working on planning for all of them. I am going to try and be prepared for everything ahead but I hope there are plenty of things that are waiting to sweep me off my feet again...

Something to think about... as we live our lives

"Dance like no one is watching

Sing like no one is listening

Love like you have never been hurt before

Live like heaven begins tomorrow."

I wish I was....

Everyday we wake up ....get dressed, put some make up (hopefully only the women) and go to work... act as we are supposed to be... what we went to school for ... what we our job titles tell us we are... what our parents dreamed for us... but what if we were given the choice to be anyone we wanted to in life...

As I started thinking about this, I had no idea who I would be if I had the option to be anything... maybe a super hero, or a star or a skinny model... hmmm maybe a powerful leader or the richest person in the world. But honestly I am lost...who am I? What is my passion? what are my dreams and aspirations? Would I be happier if I was rich, or a size zero or powerful? Would I have the joy I have in life right now? Would I still have my beautiful niece and nephew in my life? Would Sibi have found me? Would I be as satisfied in life if I had a million dollars? Or what if I was able to help eradicate poverty - that would definitely make me satisfied right? But is that what I am supposed to be? my destiny.... I honestly don't know!

But it would definitely be nice to walk in the shoes of Angelina Jolie for a day or two!

Bottoms up!!!

You are a Pint of Beer. You're happy with who you are. Sure, you may not be the 'sophisticated' and 'refined' type, but at least you're real. You don't let the little things get to you, and you have a good time no matter what life throws at you. Keep it up.

http://www.brainfall.com/test11_1.php

Here there ...Everywhere...

Relationship: the relation connecting or binding participants in a relationship: as a : KINSHIP b : a specific instance or type of kinship

So above we have the definition for a 'relationship' according to Webster's dictionary... but what does it really say? it seems to be a circular reference..... so I guess we can't just look at a dictionary to define relationships.....

As we go through life, we come across so many people ... teachers, friends, coworkers, bosses, subordinates, strangers etc... and each one of them somehow makes an impact in our lives.... so how do we define relationships with them?

It's easy to label Dad, Mom, Sister, Brother, Husband, Brother-in-Law, Sister-in-Law, Cousin and the list can go on and on... and these are all categorized under 'Family' and each is supposed to hold a level of importance in our lives.... Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother, Husband become immediate family....anything else is more extended.... and we do the saame with the people we categorize as 'Friends' - Best friends, close friends, friends and associates....

But we usually find the lines being blurred... friends become more than just friends and become more dear to us than 'Family' and family becomes something we would rather ignore. So as we go through life trying to define each person we meet into a category.... it is going to be very hard to through life defining each of our changing relationships...instead I think I have decided to take anything good that comes my way and enjoy it while it with me and as people and relationships change move on to other things while holding onto all the good impact each has had on my life....

A true blessing....

Every day... we wake up....eat breakfast, work, come home eat dinner and sleep... but in between all the things that consume our lives, how often do we take time out to look around us, in our lives and count the blessings we have in our life? Personally, I take more time out to complain about everything that is missing from my life and don't really find reason to appreciate what life has presented to me....

Last night when Sibi was working (yes working)...and I was flipping through channels trying to find something that would catch my attention, I stopped on Discovery Health as they were showing a girl who suffered from Treacher Collins and at the age of 3.5 yrs had gone through over 20 surgeries.... and looking at her and her parents, I realized that as I sat there on my bed watching TV, I was blessed and how I had failed to appreciate EACH and every single day that i had been given as a blessing....

How can we be so blinded with all the materialistic worldly possesions that we dont see that we are immensly blessed, given so many things in our lives, our family that we should be spending everyday thanking God for everything that we have and if we were to list each one of them then we might not have time do anything else...

I guess my ranting leads to one thing - every now and then we are faced with situations that make us realize how blessed we are in our life to have everything we do... so lets try and take just moments in our lives to appreciate that .... and maybe use what we have to put a smile on another person's face....

Next Please...

So I have to start by saying that my beautiful and awesome cousin Sajani has inspired me to blog... always thougth of blogging... and have to say... been very lazy to start....(like i usually am with a lot of things)

Well here goes something....let me know what you think!!!

So as life goes on.... we come across so many people... and I have always believed that each person is put in your life for a purpose, for years, months, days, or moments....we are all supposed to take these individuals and learn something from them, it might only come to us years and years after they have left our lives but we often look back and realize the impact they have made in our lives.

Recently I started thinking of my past relationships, and by that I mean friendships, romantic and blood. Every person who has come in my life has always taught me more than what I could have forseen when I first met them. I hope that all the people that I have been in contact with have been able to use my life experience to further themselves - may it be through my success or failures....

Lastly, I have realized that the people who truly care about you in life, people who are supposed to be in your life, keep coming back in one form or another... you might not talk to them for years but when you finally do, its life not a day has passed since they have made an impact in your living... Life is a funny thing, you believe that it takes its own course, but many times every decisions we make, every thought we have infact paves our way as we live....

look for a lot more mindless jabber in coming weeks!